What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

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After a few moments he returns.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

I caught my husband of 20 years looking at inappropriate pics of women on TikTok or Instagram. I'm not sure., but when I told him he got mad and made excuses of why they popped up. I then told him how I've snuck on his phone and saw what he's been looking at . We had a horrible big fight. I asked him why did he even marry me when I see the type he likes . Nothing like me, I'm petite, blonde and blue eyes. These women are dark haired dark eyed and have curvy bodies, large breasts, etc. I just don't feel the same about him after this. I can't get over this

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

If women aren't shallow, why do most tall, good-looking men have girlfriends?

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

Yes sir it is.

HELLO

Are romance novels of today still allowed to be bodice rippers, or do publishers not allow this sort of romance genre to exist anymore?

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

Sure no problem officer.

How do you get free followers on TikTok in 5 minutes?

{RING} {RING}

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.